Crucify
by Kaitsurinu
Summary: An angsty vidfic. It doesn't have a storyline, just clips of the gundam pilot's past struggles. This one was real quick to write, but I think I have the lyrics wrong. Read and reveiw kudasai!


Crucify  
By Kaitsurinu  
  
[Heero, only seven, sits in his dark room. He glares at the door, which is dented in from his pounding and he curls his bruised hands into his stomach.]  
  
Every finger in the room is pointing at me   
  
[Duo sits in the Maxwell Church alone with one light on. He jerks away from Sister Helen as she strokes his braid and smiles, and buries his head in his arms.]  
  
I wanna spit in their faces  
  
[Trowa sits out in a field, bundled up. He looks up as it gets dark and snow falls. He stands up, the wind blowing it around him, and he rubs a long gash on the back of his neck.]  
  
Then I get afraid what that could bring  
  
[Wufei stands in front of Meiran's grave. He drops his katana from his numb fingers, still mouthing words to a prayer silently.]  
  
I got a bowling ball in my stomach  
  
[Quatre stands out in the desert and jerks back and sand blows up, as he sees an orphan sitting lost and crying. He runs to it, but dives into sand and the mirage disappears.]  
  
I got a desert in my mouth  
  
[Heero lies sleeping down on his cold cot, 10 years old. The door to his room unlocks and jerks open, flooding golden light over his face. His cold blue eyes open.]  
  
Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now  
  
[Duo runs away from the Maxwell church and sits in a warehouse, as fellow orphans play around him. He just sighs and kicks a can.]  
  
I've been looking for a savior in these dirty streets  
  
[Heero's door swings open again and he is shoved in, dazed, and falls against the back wall. He drunkenly climbs into bed, smearing blood everywhere from his hands.]  
  
Looking for a savior beneath these dirty sheets  
  
[Heero throws a tantrum as a kid and runs from Dr. J, but the old man grabs him by the hand brutally with his claw.]  
  
I've been raising up my hands  
  
[Heero sits hooked up to a pain-resistance testing machine and doubles over in pain as the test starts.]  
  
Drive another nail in  
  
[Heero, still screaming with pain, looks to Dr. J in the window, blood starting to run down his forehead. Dr. J offers no sympathy.]  
  
Just what God needs  
  
[Heero blacks out and slouches limp in the chair.]  
  
One more victim  
  
[Quatre walks down a hallway, smiling, but when he reaches the door at the end, seeing Sandrock in the window, he stops. His emotions blur.]  
  
Why do we crucify ourselves  
  
[Quatre's Professor puts his hand on his shoulder and he closes his blue eyes. The door opens.]  
  
Every day I crucify myself  
  
[Heero misses a shot on a firing range and instantly Dr. J smacks him. He rubs the red mark and it earns him another smack.]  
  
Nothing I do is good enough for you  
  
[Wufei's colony explodes and he watches. He screams and throws back his head.]  
  
Crucify myself  
  
[Duo, as a kid, stands at the ruins of the Maxwell church. They seem to whirl around him. He clutches at his head.]  
  
Every day I crucify myself  
  
[An Oz soldier sits before Trowa's mobile suit, begging for mercy. He frowns and kills him instantly. As blood drips out into the grass, he just turns his green eyes away.]  
  
And my heart is sick of being in chains  
  
[Heero looks down on the Mary the puppy, watching the snow build up in its fur. Wind swirls his hair and he hides his eyes behind his bangs.]  
  
Got a kick for a dog beggin' for love  
  
[Quatre sits in Sandrock as his space heart kicks in and he doubles over.]  
  
I gotta have my suffering  
  
[Duo cries over the body of Sister Helen, putting his hand over her fatal wound and trying to stop the blood, and clutches his cross in the other.]  
  
So that I can have my cross  
  
[Trowa stands with the circus behind him blinking his green eyes confusedly. Quatre looks disappointed that he doesn't remember him, amnesia still fresh.]  
  
I know a cat named Easter  
  
[Heero sits before Dr. J, biting his lip till it bleeds as he lectures him over and over to have no emotions.]  
  
He says will you ever learn  
  
[Trowa stands emotionless as throwing knives embed themselves inches from his head. His side bursts open as one strikes and he slumps to the ground.]  
  
You're just an empty cage girl if you kill the bird  
  
[Trowa walks through a medical tent in the war zone, looking at all the dying or dead soldiers lying on the red-stained beds. His shudders and hangs his head as he walks out.]  
  
Why do we crucify ourselves?  
  
[Heero socks Duo after getting too talkative. Duo slinks back against the wall and blood leaks out the edge of his lip. Heero walks away.]  
  
Every day I crucify myself  
  
[Wufei, fighting in Nataku, accidentally misfires and the flames land on a civilian area of the city. He jerks his Gundam back but homes burn. He screams in frustration.]  
  
Nothing I do is good enough for you  
  
[Heero gets shot in the shoulder climbing out of a disabled Wing, falling back onto the armor and letting his blood leak out.]  
  
Crucify myself  
  
[Quatre looks out of the corner of his eye, seeing a little boy sobbing over his father's grave on the left monitor.]  
  
Everyday I crucify myself  
  
[Heero sits flashbacking in a dark barrack. Duo folds his arms around his knees and rests his head. Trowa sits in bed and stares at the ceiling. Quatre timidly shivers and sits with his legs over the edge of his top bunk. Wufei looks to the katana sitting beside his bed. They all close their eyes]  
  
And my heart is sick of being in chains  
  
[Heero drops at the feet of the other pilots.]  
  
Please be  
  
[They all stand in a line and look at their Gundams.]  
  
Save me  
  
[Each sits in their cockpit, dazed, as bloody memories flash across the screens maddeningly fast.]  
  
I cry  
  
[Heero leans forward in the cockpit and holds, shaking, onto the joysticks as blood gathers on the floor from a gash in his stomach.]  
  
Looking for a savior in these dirty streets  
  
[Wufei stands in the doorway of Merian's old room, silhouetted, and stares at the still-warm bed.]  
  
Looking for a savior beneath these dirty sheets  
  
[Quatre stands out in the rain, holding out his arms and letting the water soak his face.]  
  
I've been raising up my hands  
  
[Duo sits in hiding, aiming at Heero. A flicker of doubt cross his face for a second before the trigger snaps.]  
  
Drive another nail in  
  
[Deathscythe Hell opens its black wings and Duo looks at the dying soldiers lying before him.]  
  
Where are those angels  
  
[Heero lies in bed and stares blankly at an image of himself as a child, crying in the corner.]  
  
When you need them  
  
[Heero walks fearlessly into the ocean and slowly sinks, his eyes slowly closing as the sun flickers and disappears.]  
  
Why do we crucify ourselves  
  
[Duo floats out in space, his violet eyes blurred by blood, and slowly falls unconscious, as the stars seem to multiply.]  
  
Every day I crucify myself  
  
[Trowa lies on a catwalk, with his arm over the edge holding a wrench. He closes his eyes and falls asleep, letting the wrench fall.]  
  
Nothing I do is good enough for you  
  
[Quatre lies out in the desert at night, falling asleep, and he lets his cup of tea spill and roll down the dune.]  
  
Crucify myself  
  
[Wufei sits in a shallow stream, curling his arms around his knees, staring at the sakura blossoms that float there. He closes his eyes and dreams of Merian.]  
  
Everyday I crucify myself  
  
[Heero stands outside on a cliff in the dark, staring straight at the lights of the city below him.]  
  
And my heart is sick of being in chains  
  
[The Gundam pilots lie injured on the battlefield in a circle, all shot in different places, and their hands reach for each other.]  
  
Why do we change (Chains?)  
  
[Blue eyes; violet eyes; green eyes; blue eyes; obsidian eyes.]  
  
Crucify ourselves  
  
[But the blood is all red.]  
  
Everyday  
  
[It closes with Heero lying in bed and slowly opening his eyes to see a blood-stained cross on the floor.]  
  



End file.
